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The 25 Most Anticipated Movies Of Summer 2012 views: 8135

Anyone who’s been met with “Sold Out” messages while trying buy tickets to see The Avengers this weekend already knows: It’s officially summer movie season. Meaning, the need to buy passes well in advance for long-awaited, big studio fare is more important than any other time of the year. Remember, we’re only a little under three months away from a nondescript superhero sequel called The Dark Knight Rises—you may want to consult the good folks at Fandango sooner rather than later.

The next four months represent what’s unarguably the strongest summer movie lineup in years. On the prime-time front, aside from The Avengers and Christopher Nolan’s final trip to Gotham City, major studios are set to unveil Ridley Scott’s much-ballyhooed return to visceral, H.R. Giger-inspired science fiction, a seemingly unnecessary but still promising reboot of Spider-Man, a remake of Arnold Schwarzenegger’s classic collaboration with a three-booby alien, and the grittiest interpretation of Snow White ever.

And that’s just the movies set for wide release. In the independent world, the next few months will be just as rich, with Sundance Film Festival award-winners and some of the year’s best horror flicks all on the immediate horizon. Are you excited yet? If not, check out our list of The 25 Most Anticipated Movies Of Summer 2012 and see how long you can resist the urge to bombard Fandango.

25.The Bourne Legacy

Director: Tony Gilroy
Stars: Jeremy Renner, Edward Norton, Rachel Weisz, Joan Allen, Oscar Isaac, Scott Glenn, Corey Stoll
Release date: August 3

To the grade-A action franchise’s most adamant fans, making another Bourne installment without leading man and action movie standout Matt Damon must sound like infuriating blasphemy. Though directors Doug Liman (The Bourne Identity) and Paul Greengrass (The Bourne Supremacy, The Bourne Ultimatum) heavily impressed behind their respective cameras, the main attraction in all three films has been Damon, with his superb acting and brutally authentic fight skills. You’d think that a Bourne movie sans him would be as ridiculous as Rambo Reborn starring Taylor Lautner.

The Bourne Legacy, however, seems deserving of optimism. For one, its director is Tony Gilroy (Michael Clayton), who's been a credited Bourne screenwriter on all three entries. Consistency aside, they’ve given the series’ entitlement, and new non-Jason-Bourne protagonist role, to new star Jeremy Renner, a terrific actor who’s just now finding himself on Hollywood’s A-list after years of stellar co-starring performances. And as if that’s not enough, the perennially under-employed Edward Norton is also involved, reportedly as The Bourne Legacy’s chief antagonist. Be thankful, Bourne enthusiasts: It could’ve been a lot worse.

24.That's My Boy That's My Boy 2012

Director: Sean Anders
Stars: Adam Sandler, Andy Samberg, Leighton Meester, Milo Ventimiglia, Will Forte, Rachel Dratch, Nick Swardson, Vanilla Ice, James Caan, Ciara
Release date: June 15

Revisiting the dumbass comedy favorite Billy Madison, or even Happy Gilmore, should be an enjoyable experience, not a depressing one. Yet, the latter adjective is precisely how we’d describe the feeling that comes with watching an old Adam Sandler movie these days, doing so with the knowledge that the hilarious younger man you see on screen will eventually stop giving a damn and start making painfully unfunny money-makers like Grown Ups or, gasp, last year’s Jack & Jill. Frankly, it’s torture.

But it’s also extremely tough to resist a new Sandler movie when it also stars Andy Samberg as his son, and when it’s directed by someone who has no ties to Sandler’s all-inclusive circle of mostly inferior friends (John Anders, one-half of the writing team behind the slept-on comedies Sex Drive and She’s Out of My League).

So, as potentially masochistic as it may be, we’ll be the first in line to see That’s My Boy come June 15th; hopefully come June 16th, the aforementioned Billy Madison isn’t on par with Requiem for a Dream or We Need to Talk About Kevin on the downer scale.

23.Savages Savages movie

Director: Oliver Stone
Stars: Taylor Kitsch, Aaron Johnson, Blake Lively, John Travolta, Salma Hayek, Benicio Del Toro, Joel David Moore, Emile Hirsch, Uma Thurman
Release date: July 6

Once upon a time, filmmaker Oliver Stone directed brilliant and fearlessly edgy pics such as Platoon, JFK, and Natural Born Killers; in recent years, however, he’s been anything but prolific, occasionally returning to theaters with forgettable “event movies” like W. and Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps. So when news of Savages (based on a novel written by Don Winslow) first broke, the knee-jerk reaction was to expect the worse.

But then the film’s trailer debuted last month, and, wouldn’t you know it, Stone seems to be back on his genre shit. Looking all kinds of sordid and exploitative (both good things), Savages finds two free-living weed dealers (Taylor “John Carter” Kitsch and Aaron “Kick-Ass” Johnson) who take on a Mexican drug cartel (led by Salma Hayek) in order to rescue their shared girlfriend (Blake Lively).

For once, it doesn’t seem like Stone has any sort of political and social message agenda, a la damn near every movie he’s made. Savages just gives off dirty, unapologetic vibes, and we’re all for that.

22.Take This Waltz

Director: Sarah Polley
Stars: Seth Rogen, Michelle Williams, Luke Kirby, Sarah Silverman
Release date: June 29

Yes, it’s a soft, if not also familiar, premise: A married woman (here, Michelle Williams) begins to question her domestic ties to her hubby (Seth Rogen) after meeting an exciting charmer (Luke Kirby) by chance. Replace Williams with Jennifer Aniston and you’d have a painful rom-com that’s basically a slice of cinematic repellent for you and your hard-earned money, right?

If you’re nodding your head in agreement, you couldn’t be any more wrong. Written and directed by actress turned director Sarah Polley, Take This Waltz tells its story of possible infidelity without playing by any expected limitations—the plot transpires unpredictably, the humor is often countered by somber melancholy, and several scenes (including a Tilt-A-Whirl ride set against The Buggles’ “Video Killed the Radio Star”) are simultaneously enchanting and haunting.

Holding the whole poignant shebang together is Williams, the Academy Award nominee who’s second to none when it comes to embodying an emotionally fragile woman whose transgressions do little to diminish one’s sympathy toward her. Take This Waltz is the perfect date movie, in that it’s highly entertaining while also educational in regards of what not to do with your significant other.

21.Red Hook Summer

Director: Spike Lee
Stars: Clarke Peters, Jules Brown, De’Adre Aziza, Nate Parker, Tony Lysaith, Heather Alicia Simms
Release date: August 10

As Spike Lee made adamantly clear during the film’s post-screening press conference at Sundance, Red Hook Summer is not Do The Right Thing 2, but you can’t blame speculators for thinking so. Putting the outspoken filmmaker back in both his indie roots and his Brooklyn stomping grounds, this lo-fi look at a southern kid’s time spent in BK with his preacher uncle (The Wire’s Clarke Peters) operates with the same type of scathing social commentary (a third act reveal takes the film to a very dark, perverted place) and within the same universe (Lee makes a cameo as Do The Right Thing’s Mookie, Dodgers shirt and all).

Unsurprisingly for a Spike Lee joint, Red Hook Summer caused much dissent amongst critics at Sundance, with some praising the director’s return to his fearless, do-it-yourself roots and others decrying the film’s harrowing conclusion. But, really, would we expect anything less from Tyler Perry’s number one hater?

20.Brave Brave 2012

Director: Mark Andrews, Brenda Chapman, and Steve Purcell
Stars: Kelly Macdonald, Emma Thompson, Kevin McKidd, Julie Walters, Robbie Coltrane, Billy Connolly, John Ratzenberger, Craig Ferguson
Release date: June 22

The arrival of a new Pixar film is always a cause for celebration—that’s the type of confidence a studio earns when its past offerings include movies as amazing as WALL-E, The Incredibles, and the Toy Story series. So, just off the strength of its corporate backbone, Brave merits immediate anticipation. But then comes its uniqueness, and we’re even more amped.

David Fincher's The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo and the lesser-seen, though just as commendable, Haywire started the trend, and the recent juggernaut The Hunger Games formally solidified it: Cinema is currently in an age of kick-ass female leads. Brave, about a proficient archer (voiced by Boardwalk Empire’s Kelly Macdonald) who lives in a mythical version of Scotland and protects her kingdom against various byproducts of evil witchcraft, is the trend’s inevitable kid-friendly example. And we’re just as excited as your pre-teen little sister.

19.Moonrise Kingdom

Director: Wes Anderson
Stars: Bruce Willis, Edward Norton, Bill Murray, Tilda Swinton, Harvey Keitel, Frances McDormand, Jason Schwartzman, Kara Hayward, Jared Gilman
Release date: May 25

There are only so many explosions, superhero costumes, and special effects reels that one moviegoer can take before he or she needs a counter-programmed alternative. Filling that bill this summer is writer/director Wes Anderson’s typically subdued dramedy Moonrise Kingdom, co-written by Roman Coppola.

Anti-blockbuster in every way imaginable, the coming-of-age film, which takes places in the ’60s, shows the aftermath of two in-love teenagers’ (newcomers Kara Hayward and Jared Gilman) mutual decision to head out of town together, a maneuver that causes a ragtag group of adults, including the her parents (Bill Murray and Tilda Swinton), the sheriff (Bruce Willis), and his Boy Scout leader (Edward Norton).

With a cast like that, it’s no wonder that Moonrise Kingdom was selected to open this month’s prestigious Cannes Film Festival; though, we’re sure Anderson’s filmography (see: Rushmore, The Royal Tenenbaums, and The Fantastic Mr. Fox, amongst other recommendable works) also has something to do with it.

18.Killer Joe

Director: William Friedkin
Stars: Matthew McConaughey, Emile Hirsch, Juno Temple, Thomas Haden Church, Juno Temple
Release date: July 27

The power of a thunderous movie ending should never be underestimated. Even if everything that precedes a film’s closing scenes underwhelms, the last shot can send audiences out on a high that’ll make them forgive all of the inadequacies. Yet, what makes acclaimed director William Friedkin’s (The French Connection, The Exorcist) extremely pulpy and grimy, though unfairly NC-17-rated, Killer Joe such a complete success is that, yes, it has one of the craziest, entertainingly off-the-rails endings in recent years, but the film as a whole is a victory.

In screenwriter Tracy Letts’ adaptation of his own Pulitzer Prize-winning play, Matthew McConaughey gives a smoldering, combustible turn as a seedy Dallas cop, nicknamed Killer Joe, whose side hustle involves killing folks for cash; his target of the moment is the good-for-nothing mother of a young, in-debt deadbeat (Emile Hirsch) from a dysfunctional trailer park family. Unable to pay Joe, Hirsch begrudgingly gives his cute space cadet of a little sister (Juno Temple) up as a “retainer.”

From there, Killer Joe fires on all trashy cylinders, gleefully offering up sex with a minor, corpses, brutal misogyny, and the most perverted use of a fried chicken leg imaginable. And the best part of it all: It’s a black comedy. One that’s funny as hell, in fact.

17.Ruby Sparks

Director: Jonathan Dayton and Valerie Faris
Stars: Paul Dano, Zoe Kazan, Chris Messina, Elliot Gould, Annette Benning, Antonio Banderas, Steve Coogan, Deborah Ann Woll, Aasif Mandvi
Release date: July 25

Is there such a thing as the perfect woman? Unfortunately, the answer is, “No,” though that recent video of Kate Upton doing the “Cat Daddy” dance in her teeny bikini does have us ready to change our mind. But imagine if the Sports Illustrated cover model hung all over you every waking second of every single day—after a while, it’d grow old. Yes, it really would, because the moment you try to sneak off for a drink with the fellas or just some mundane alone time, she’d be there, crying and begging for more attention. Again, we swear it’d grow old.

That’s part of the lofty concept behind Ruby Sparks, the first movie from directors Jonathan Dayton and Valerie Faris since the 2006 indie hit Little Miss Sunshine. Here, the filmmaking duo flip a screenplay written by star, and first-time scribe, Zoe Kazan, who plays a made-up dream girl spawned from a struggling, introverted, and depressed novelist’s (Paul Dano) typewriter.

Named, that’s right, Ruby Sparks, the writer’s latest fictional character somehow appears in real life and, unbeknownst to her, is at his mercy; if he types, “Ruby barks like a dog,” she has to make like a pooch. How Kazan’s impressively funny and thought-provoking script plays with that concept is what gives Ruby Sparks its quirky and unconventionally romantic excellence. It’s a date movie for the thinking man and his equally educated girlfriend.

16.Total Recall

Director: Len Wiseman
Stars: Colin Farrell, Jessica Biel, Kate Beckinsale, Bryan Cranston, John Cho, Bill Nighy, Bokeem Woodbine, Ethan Hawke
Release date: August 3

Last week, all was once again right with the world. Why? Because reports from the Las Vegas event CinemaCon 2012 confirmed that director Len Wiseman’s remake of Total Recall does in fact update the original’s “three-breasted hooker” scene, thus calming down horny nerds who were ready to riot in the streets over the thought of not seeing Colin Farrell drop a one-liner to an alien with a triple set of boobies.

See, it’s the little things that matter in life. Still, though, the jury remains out on whether the latest take on sci-fi author Philip K. Dick’s 1966 short story “We Can Remember It for You Wholesale” can reach the same levels of gleeful violence, bugged-out E.T.’s, and futuristic bravado achieved by Paul Verhoeven’s 1990 version, which starred Arnold Schwarzenegger in one of his all-time great roles.

Can Colin Farrell retain even half of Arnie’s vintage cool? Until we’re sold on the answer to that million-dollar question being “Yes,” we’ll have to settle for the double whammy casting of beauties Kate Beckinsale and Jessica Biel, both of whom have only two sweater puppets a piece—just in case you were wondering.

15.Lovely Molly

Director: Eduardo Sanchez
Stars: Gretchen Lodge, Johnny Lewis, Alexandra Holden
Release date: May 18

Modern-day horror doesn’t get much creepier than Lovely Molly, the latest effort from Eduardo Sanchez, one-half of the team behind 1999’s The Blair Witch Project. That found-footage game-changer is, of course, a classic, but it’s perfectly in line to say that Lovely Molly is Sanchez’s best film to date. Pitch-black in its darkness and slickly ambiguous, it moves along at an incredibly unnerving pace, slithering its way along until reaching a completely satisfying payoff.

Newcomer Gretchen Lodge is dynamite as the titular Molly, a newlywed who moves into her family’s old, spooky home with her new husband (Sons Of Anarchy vet Johnny Lewis); there, memories of her deceased father and the horse stable nearby settle into her mind, triggering a violent mental breakdown. Is it possession? Or an old drug addiction resurfacing?

Sanchez drops several clues for every possible explanation, along with seriously effective deaths, hints of the supernatural that aren’t telegraphed, and several haunting set-pieces, one of which keeps nails bit as Molly hears an unseen someone crooning a macabre tune.

Lovely Molly gets under your skin from its first moment through its eerie conclusion. It’s sophisticated genre material, and deserves to be this year’s Insidious if given the right marketing push.

14.Paranorman

Director: Chris Butler and Sam Fell
Stars: Kodi Smit-McPhee, Christopher Mintz-Plasse, Anna Kendrick, Leslie Mann, Casey Affleck, John Goodman, Jeff Garlin
Release date: August 17

Looking ahead at the summer's animated movie options, Disney and Pixar’s Brave is easily the most anticipated, with its young female protagonist (an archer voiced by Boardwalk Empire’s Kelly Macdonald). Yet, folks such as ourselves—meaning, sickos who’d gleefully compile a list of 10 movies you can’t un-see—have Focus Features’ ParaNorman to look forward to.

The genre kiddie flick follows a lonely suburban kid (The Road and Let Me In’s Kodi Smit-McPhee) whose abilities to chat with dead people makes him the only one capable of saving the day when zombies, werewolves, apparitions, and witches invade his town. In other words, every 10-year-old, monster-movie-obsessed little boy’s dream come true. Where we do sign up?

13.Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter Abraham Lincoln Vampire Hunter

Director: Timur Bekmambetov
Stars: Benjamin Walker, Mary Elizabeth Winstead, Rufus Sewell, Dominic Cooper, Alan Tudyk, Jimmi Simpson, Anthony Mackie, Robin McLeavy
Release date: June 22

It’s certainly this summer’s riskiest and craziest popcorn movie: Based on Seth Grahame-Smith’s historical fiction/horror novel of the same name, Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter re-imagines the former president’s life before he entered the White House in 1861, presenting Honest Abe as an axe-wielding, martial-arts-savvy defender of the night who specializes in offing undead bloodsuckers.

True, Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter is as dangerously high-concept as last year’s ultimately disastrous Cowboys and Aliens, but there are several factors at play here that instill much confidence. For one, it’s directed by Timur Bekmambetov, a visual extremist whose box office hit Wanted proved that he could pull off the insanity of his 2004 cult favorite, Night Watch, with known actors. And the cast itself is a big plus, too, including frequent scene-stealers Anthony Mackie and Dominic Cooper, as well as genre actress extraordinaire Mary Elizabeth Winstead.

Assuming that Bekmambetov and producer Tim Burton can follow through on the massive-in-scope promise of the film’s impressive trailers, Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter could very well be one of the summer’s biggest surprises.

12.The Campaign The Campaign 2012

Director: Jay Roach
Stars: Will Ferrell, Zach Galifianakis, Jason Sudeikis, Sarah Baker, Dylan McDermott, Brian Cox, John Lithgow, Dan Aykroyd
Release date: August 10

Note to Zach Galifianakis: After last year’s horrendous The Hangover Part II, you’re standing on thin ice, pal. Fortunately, going joke-for-joke with the almighty Will Ferrell in a promising summer comedy is a step in the right direction, especially when the film in question taps into political idiocy in a timely election year fashion.

Although we’d be lying if we didn’t say that it’d be better to see John C. Reilly in Galifianakis’ role here, The Campaign gets our pre-viewing vote of confidence, thanks to its simple yet ripe premise (that of two North Carolina politicians verbally duking it out for a bigger office position) and director Jay Roach’s track record with political satire (he directed HBO’s two recent winners Recount and Game Change).

11.The Loved Ones

Director: Sean Byrne
Stars: Robin McLeavy, Xavier Samuel, John Brumpton, Richard Wilson, Victoria Thaine, Jessica McNamee, Andrew S. Gilbert
Release date: June 1

It’s been a long road to American multiplexes for the Australian horror movie The Loved Ones. Made way back in 2009, writer/director Sean Byrne’s high school freak-show first premiered in various film festivals to widespread acclaim from genre critics, who’ve all been talking the film up for the last three years. And for good reason. We’ve seen The Loved Ones, and trust us: The hype is real.

Combining playful Grand Guignol lunacy, the wackiness of John Waters movies, and the teen angst of John Hughes flicks, The Loved Ones ricochets back and forth from a viciously horrific film to a witty, humorous one, showing what happens when a high school outcast (a stellar Robin McLeavy, who crafts an iconic horror villain here) kidnaps the boy of her dreams on prom night and subjects him to all kinds of mental and physical tortures in her kitchen, alongside her demented pops.

As they say, horror fans, good things come to those who wait, as well as those who didn’t even know The Loved Ones existed before reading this.

10.Magic Mike

Director: Steven Soderbergh
Stars: Channing Tatum, Alex Pettyfer, Matthew McConaughey, Cody Horn, Olivia Munn, Adam Rodriguez, Matt Bomer, Joe Manganiello, Wendi McLendon-Covey, Riley Keough
Release date: June 29

It takes real men to admit that they’re excited about a movie in which a bunch of buff, shirtless dudes prance around on stages and strip for cash—right? That’s how we’ve been convincing ourselves that Magic Mike is worth the pre-release anticipation, a superficial defense against what should be an easily justifiable project. A gender-reversed Showgrirls, it most certainly isn’t, folks.

For starters, it’s directed by the venerable Steven Soderbergh (Che, the Ocean’s Eleven movies, Traffic), and, after his excellent comedic turn in 21 Jump Street, Channing Tatum has earned his stripes as a leading man likeable for both guys and gals. Also co-starring the resurgent Matthew McConaughey, Magic Mike has more than enough agreeable components to deflect any claims of questionable masculinity in its male ticket-purchasers.

9.Safety Not Guaranteed

Director: Colin Trevorrow
Stars: Aubrey Plaza, Mark Duplass, Jake M. Johnson, Karan Soni, Mary Lynn, Rajskub, Jenica Bergere, Jeff Garlin, Kristen Bell
Release date: June 8

Safety Not Guaranteed is a testament to the fact that, when you’ve got a fine cast and a smart screenwriter, the most overdone of concepts can work like gangbusters. The subject of time travel isn’t revolutionary, nor is the Amblin-esque theme of “dream big,” but first-time director Colin Trevorrow’s quirky and heartfelt comedy breezes through its scant 85-minute duration with a delightful freshness.

Aubrey Plaza, adding subtle complexities to her usual awkward demeanor, plays a Seattle-based magazine intern who, along with an arrogant reporter (New Girl’s Jake M. Johnson, whose comedic timing is impeccable here) and a nerdy fellow intern (Karan Soni, who’s also spot-on with his one-liners), track down an eccentric grocery store worker (Mark Duplass) after he requests a partner for time travel through the classifieds.

The expected beats are all hit: There’s an obvious love connection, the geek caps off his first drunken night with some sex, and the douchebag betters himself. Fortunately, screenwriter Derek Connolly’s characters are well developed, and the actors uniformly sell every quieter moment and sillier, punchline-dependent gag. A real actor’s showcase, Safety Not Guaranteed charms more than enough to allow you to overlook any minor qualms.

8.The Amazing Spider-Man

Director: Marc Webb
Stars: Andrew Garfield, Emma Stone, Rhys Ifans, Embeth Davidtz, Denis Leary, Martin Sheen, Sally Field, C. Thomas Howell, Irrfan Khan, Amber Stevens, Chris Zylka
Release date: July 3

Does the world really need another cinematic interpretation of the Spider-Man saga? As far as we can tell, Sam Raimi’s trilogy, starring Tobey Maguire as Peter Parker, did a rather fine job of giving Marvel Comics’ wall-crawling superhero a proper movie platform—and, yes, we’re including the problematic Spider-Man 3 in that assessment.

When it was announced that Raimi had fallen back from directing any more Spidey flicks, due to behind-the-scenes drama, naturally our reaction was one of pessimistic dread. That is, before Marc Webb, director of the excellent rom-com (500) Days Of Summer, was revealed as the reboot’s overseer and top-billed duo Andrew Garfield (The Social Network) and Emma Stone (Easy A) stepped in as the film’s stars. We’re also not mad at the decision to give popular Spider-Man villain The Lizard (played here by Rhys Ifans) his long-overdue movie debut. Anything is better than Topher Grace’s Venom.

7.Piranha 3DD

Director: Jon Gulager
Stars: Danielle Panabaker, Christopher Lloyd, Katrina Bowden, Ving Rhames, Chris Zylka, Gary Busey, Allison Mack, Jacqueline MacInnes Wood, David Koechner, David Hasselhoff, Meagan Tandy, Matt Bush, Paul Scheer, Elise Neal
Release date: June 1

Get this: After watching a naked underwater ballet featuring two buxom beauties, a guy’s penis get spit toward the camera in 3D, and an extended orgy of slaughter that drips more blood in less than 10 minutes than most horror movies do in 90, some unsatisfied customers actually accused the 2010 T&A-horror romp Piranha 3D of being too soft. In their eyes, director Alexandre Aja’s gory comedy didn’t go far enough, a complaint that Piranha 3DD overseer Jon Gulager felt the need to silence this time around.

One look at the film’s trailer is all the haters need to feel good about the sequel—look no further than the shots of Ving Rhames’ (who died in the first movie, mind you) machine gun leg, batshit crazy Gary Busey biting a piranha in half, and Katrina Bowden transmitting a killer fish into a dude’s you-know-what during sex. Resembling a slightly glossier version of one of those straight-to-SyFy-channel Z-movies, Piranha 3DD looks like the kind of sleazy, no-holds-barred camp that Roger Corman would dream up under the influence of hallucinogenic narcotics. And, yes, that’s totally a compliment.

6.Ted Ted movie

Director: Seth MacFarlane
Stars: Mark Wahlberg, Seth MacFarlane, Mila Kunis, Giovanni Ribisi, Jessica Stroup, Joel McHale, Patrick Warburton, Laura Vandervoort
Release date: July 13

With all of the superhero movies and other high-concept genre pictures on the horizon, the one film genre that’s surprisingly looking quite lax this summer is comedy—think about how many (hopefully) funny movies you’ve read about on the way to this sixth slot. You can count them all on one hand with a broken finger.

Even if the impending warm weather months were stuffed with comedies, though, it’d still take a project of Anchorman 2’s potential to promise more laughs than Ted, the feature film directorial debut of Family Guy mastermind Seth MacFarlane. Sticking to what he knows best (animation), MacFarlane’s jump-off movie stars Mark Wahlberg as a grown man whose love life and career constantly get interrupted by his best friend, who just so happens to be a talking, weed-smoking, hooker-paying, and profane teddy bear (voiced by MacFarlane himself).

Having seen Ted’s first eight minutes, we can vouch for its hard-R humor; for example, when Wahlberg’s character tells Ted that his girlfriend wants more, the stuffed animal replies, “What, anal?” If the sight of a Teddy Ruxpin’s counterpart cracking wise with a potty mouth doesn’t make you chuckle, might we suggest a new friend by the name of Mary Jane?

5.Beasts of the Southern Wild

Director: Benh Zeitlin
Stars: Quvenzhané Wallis, Dwight Henry
Release date: June 27

Of all the buzz-worthy films that premiered at this past January's Sundance Film Festival, Beasts of the Southern Wild emerged as the festival’s hottest property, taking home the grand jury prize in the U.S. dramatic competition. Not bad for a star-free and experimental drama that was previously on no one’s radar.

Beasts of the Southern Wild follows a 6-year-old named Hushpuppy (first-time actress Quvenzhané Wallis), who lives near a levee in Southern Louisiana with her terminally ill father (Dwight Henry) and his stories about her nowhere-to-be-found mother. Much of the praise for Zeitlin’s flick has been cast directly upon his visual sense, specifically on how he renders Hushpuppy’s imagination in abstract and colorfully hypnotic ways. It all sounds like Where The Wild Things Are on a much smaller budget and without giant creatures, and that’s all the tease we need to get excited.

4.Lawless Lawless movie

Director: John Hillcoat
Stars: Shia LaBeouf, Tom Hardy, Gary Oldman, Guy Pearce, Jessica Chastain, Mia Wasikowska, Dane DeHaan, Jason Clarke, Noah Taylor
Release date: August 31

Is this going to be the summer of Tom Hardy? Considering that he’s playing the hulking villain Bane in The Dark Knight Rises, that doesn’t seem like a stretch. But it takes more than one project for a new actor to truly catapult onto Hollywood’s A-list—notice how Michael I’m-the-man-now Fassbender starred in not one but four critically acclaimed flicks last year. In Hardy’s case, his other movie not based on a DC Comics character is also one that could very well sneak its way into late-2012 awards lists.

Directed by the underrated John Hillcoat (The Proposition, The Road), Lawless finds Hardy starring alongside Shia LaBeouf and Jason Clarke as three brothers who collect dollars through bootlegging in Prohibition-era Virginia, and whose illegal alcohol-pushing hustles get violently interrupted by both the fuzz and rival moonshine distributors. Sounds like the perfectly gritty, bullet-to-the-head way to cap off a summer overflowing with CGI excess and pricey major studio tentpoles.

3.Snow White and the Huntsman

Director: Rupert Sanders
Stars: Kristen Stewart, Chris Hemsworth, Charlize Theron, Sam Claflin, Ian McShane, Toby Jones, Nick Frost, Ray Winstone, Bob Hoskins, Eddie Marsan, Lily Cole
Release date: June 1

Look, we hate on Twilight here as much as the next red-blooded men’s brand, but the truth is that we like Kristen Stewart—quite a bit, actually. And it pains us to watch her blandly work her way through those lame vampire movies, knowing that, in real life, she’s far quirkier and more interesting than the fictional Bella Swan. She’s also a dynamite actress whenever she wants to be, like in the severely underrated Adventureland.

Thus, we’re stoked to see her headlining a project as cool as Snow White and the Huntsman. Director Rupert Sanders’ dark, edgy fairy tale adventure features Chris Hemsworth (Thor) as a bounty hunter who’s hired by the Evil Queen (Charlize Theron, an automatic plus) to capture Miss White (Stewart), but who ultimately teaches her how to become a warrior and take the Queen down. One glimpse of Stewart in her armor suit, with sword in hand, and you might just have a new fetish to hide from loved ones.

2.The Dark Knight Rises

Director: Christopher Nolan
Stars: Christian Bale, Tom Hardy, Michael Caine, Gary Oldman, Anne Hathaway, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Marion Cotillard, Matthew Modine, Morgan Freeman, Juno Temple, Josh Pence
Release date: July 20

Does it still suck knowing that we’ll never get another chance to watch Heath Ledger dominate as The Joker? Absolutely, but everything about The Dark Knight Rises' pre-release hype machine thus far, namely the most recently released, chilling, and final, trailer, promises tons of compensation. Set eight years after the events seen in 2008’s financial juggernaut, The Dark Knight, director Christopher Nolan’s third and final Caped Crusader blockbuster appears to be the series’ darkest chapter, with Bane (Tom Hardy, looking monstrous) leading an uprising of convicts, deviants, and other troublemakers (including a potential Batman ally in Catwoman, played by Anne Hathaway) in the streets of Gotham.

Both Nolan and Christian Bale have made it clear that The Dark Knight Rises will be their final Bat-film as director and star, respectively. And you know what that means: This could very well be our last chance to see a great movie based on DC Comics’ iconic character before Robert Pattinson gets cast as Bruce Wayne in a youth-minded reboot. In this case, parting won’t only be equivalent to sweet sorrow—barring any unimaginable disasters, it’ll surely be badass superhero euphoria.

But, yes, you've read that right: The Dark Knight Rises lands at the No. 2 spot here. Blasphemy? We're defiantly saying, "Hell, no," because we're only a month away from...

1.Prometheus Prometheus movie

Director: Ridley Scott
Stars: Noomi Rapace, Charlize Theron, Michael Fassbender, Idris Elba, Logan Marshall-Green, Rafe Spall, Sean Harris, Guy Pearce, Kate Dickie
Release date: June 8

Fanboy sacrilege, you say? Placing any film above The Dark Knight Rises on a countdown of the summer’s most awaited flicks? Perhaps you haven’t seen the most recent Prometheus trailer, or you’re one of the unfortunate few who’s never experienced Ridley Scott’s 1979 science fiction masterwork, Alien, and you can’t comprehend the monstrousness of Mr. Scott returning to the world of hardcore, R-rated, quasi-horror sci-fi that he virtually created 33 years ago.

Whatever the case may be, we’re confident in the present ranking of Prometheus, almost as assured as we are that Scott’s thought-to-be Alien prequel will hug our faces with sickness. Oh, yeah, there’s actually a plot, too: Noomi Rapace (the original Girl with the Dragon Tattoo) and Charlize Theron lead a team of space explorers on a mission to link archaeological findings to the causes of humanity’s entire existence—you know, slight work.

Per the trailer’s none-too-subtle hints, the crew’s efforts don’t go unpunished by what appear to be various extraterrestrial life-forms with insidious agendas. Or maybe Rapace and her cohorts simply turn on each other amidst an otherworldly backdrop. Either way, Prometheus promises to push the sci-fi genre into brutal, cerebral, and disturbing new realms, in ways more grown-up than your typical summer blockbuster. In laymen’s terms, we can’t fucking wait.